Candy Ass and the Seven Stalkers

Ok, so no Cheapo Wino Review yesterday. Wanna know why? I drank the expensive shit. I’m sorry, but on Tuesday I ran 2 miles without stopping and I felt like I deserved only the best wine calories to celebrate my weak ass accomplishment. Anywhoo, guiltily moving on…

I hope you’ve read Monday’s post (my expensive nail salon trip) and Tuesday’s Tip (re-purposing children’s books) because only then you can truly appreciate the following bedtime story:

I’m reading this to Brian tonight. Do you think it’ll work or should I just go with Plan B: wrapping the receipt around a hot wing and handing it to him after sex?

Could you please VOTE!? Just click the banner, and that’s it! Thanks!