The Family goes to Philly

 Let me start by saying that we are not one of those families that takes their children on day trips, cultural trips, or educational trips…unless they revolve around a really great restaurant.  In fact, we first think of a place where we’d like to eat then we make a mental map of the places we can go while waiting for that restaurant to open.  I mean, why drive all the way to the zoo or aquarium when  Petco is right next to Cafe Napoli? Museum? Nah, there’s a little antique store next to Jessop’s Tavern (the best crab dip ever! Am I right Joanne?). We don’t even go to Disney unless Epcot is having their Food & Wine Festival.

 So imagine my surprise when Brian suggested we go to The Franklin Friggin Institute! Whoa, what? I’m immediately suspicious. Then he says,”you know, I think it’s only a mile from the Reading Market”. Yeah, the same Reading Market that has DiNic’s famous porkette sandwich, I’m onto you.  So now I’m thinking ‘Do I want to ride 45 min for a porkette sandwich?’ instead of ‘wow, my kids would get so much out of the Franklin Institute’. What the hell is wrong with us? Any culture they get is apparently the result of the hospitality industry. I say to myself, ‘c’mon Kim, strap on the fanny pack and do the damn day trip’. So we go.

The institute is fun, the kids seem to enjoy it. There is a moment in the heart exhibit when we lose Ana around the aorta but she eventually emerges from the right ventricle.  No harm done. All in all we have a good time.

And Brian is doing a great job of being patient knowing that DiNic’s closes at 6pm.  At 5pm we head out WALKING the mile to the market. Ugh. We’re taking in all the sights and sounds of the city. We get to the beautiful LOVE park and see a wedding party taking pictures with hot pink flowers as their background and a passed out homeless guy as their foreground.

Strangely, everyone  was acting like this wasn’t happening, like he wasn’t just laying there in front of the photographer. I began to wonder of I was imaging him so I took a picture- nope, he showed up on the film. Moving along, we’re approaching the market, I’m getting hungry, then I smell…but of course, horse shit. Yup. There was horse shit and hay on the road outside of the Reading Market. I still don’t understand why and I’ll probably never know. When we go into the market Brian stands in line for DiNic’s and I go in search of pizza for the kids. I go around that god forsaken place 3 times before finding a slice of pizza  Meanwhile Ana throws several fits because I won’t let her out of the stroller. By the time Brian gives me my porkette sandwich I’m thinking,’this better give me an orgasm, make my boobs grow, or cause me to shit gold’. Obviously I was setting it up for failure. It was good but none of the above happened. Exhausted and full we drove home. And I had a well deserved and much desired glass of wine (or two/three).